“The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why!” Mark Twain
People frequently comment on how lucky I am to be doing what I love to do as a writer, but when I’ve shared my story with them, they’re usually astounded at how challenging my journey has been to get here.
My life has been a myriad of experimental mayhem. I’ve navigated the ocean of harsh twists and turns, overcoming the often-wrong choices I made, the costly mistakes that I had to endure, the frustration of constantly hitting a wall whenever I tried to succeed at something, but regardless, my inner radar would not rest until I found my island of truth.
“Failure has been my biggest teacher!” I would often say. This wasn’t to discourage them from their dream but to merely share my honesty at how much my life has been thwarted by failure to eventually understand the true value in its lesson.
When I first learned to read, it was as if I’d found a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow. It gave me freedom, opened my imaginative faculty and allowed me to play with a dimension that sparked a deep passion in me for my love of words.
When I told my father at the age of 5 that I wanted to be a writer when I was older he said, “Don’t be so stupid! You can’t earn money writing silly stories!”
That was the end of my dream and the beginning of many years of struggle to avoid my heart’s deepest longing.
Not only did it take me down a misguided path of years satisfying the needs of others, but it also created imbalances in my life through avoidance including addictions, depression, isolation, confusion and despair. The list was endless and my reality created a world devoid of love.
In an attempt to counterbalance the pain I wrote in secret, like it was medicine. From the secret diaries I stashed in our garden shed as a child so my family wouldn’t find them, to the stories and poetry I wrote and hid in journals in my attic as an adult. Even when I started writing articles and workshops for my business as a consultant, created content for my radio show and became a columnist for a mainstream magazine, I still didn’t feel worthy enough to accept what I really wanted to do.
Finally, when asked to write my memoir I was horrified at first by the idea of becoming so ‘exposed.’ Serendipity however can be a cruel temptress when faced with choice. I ended up in hospital soon after and needing to focus my energy into something to get me through, so I gave in and started to write.
Writing in secret for the sake of catharsis is one thing but to take that bold step to claim myself as a writer created a whole heap of soul searching and peeling away the layers of self-doubt, negative programs from my past and most of all, the voices of those who’d been part of my journey to self-sabotage.
Even though it was excruciatingly uncomfortable at times in finding myself, I was finally moving closer to who I was, becoming my true self who emerged to find my Place in this world, my People, my Purpose and my Peace. These are what I call the vital 4 P’s to living an authentic life!
According to worldwide statistics through Gallup in 2014, a staggering 900 million people worldwide in 142 countries were recorded as ‘unfulfilled with what they do in their life.’ Each one of us cannot change the world alone but honouring our purpose is key to working collaboratively to make a difference.
Imagine the impact, these people would make if they started to do something they valued in themselves and therefore, others!
Want to identify how authentically you’re living your life right now?
Answer the following:
- Do you enjoy the moments in life or is your focus more so on achievement, competition and struggle?
- Are you a watered-down version of yourself or living someone else’s dream?
- Do you punish or judge yourself for mistakes or failures?
- Do you know who you are in the quiet moments, what you love to do and what your purpose is?
- Are you open to new experience or do you hide away through fear?
- Do you take part in activities which promote growth to develop your soul?
- Do you speak your truth with vulnerability and empathy towards others?
- Do you recognize your strengths and passions?
- Is your heart open to giving and receiving?
- Do you incorporate daily practices into your life for growth?
- Do you focus more on love or fear?
- Do you hone into your inner senses to make wise choices?
If you recognised that you are not living an authentic life through answering these questions above, then perhaps you’ve not yet found your purpose or are avoiding it through fear of failure. Let’s take this further!
Do you know your purpose? Are you creating your life from your heart, knowing that when you wake up every day you’re driven by what you’re passionate about or are you following somebody else’s rules/living by somebody else’s terms? Often, we know what we’re here to achieve in our subconscious, but we can get side tracked or influenced by parents/peers or those who feel they know what’s best for us.
Do you love what you do? Are you making a difference? Are you inspiring or teaching others? If you’ve answered no to any of these questions and you feel something is calling you to find your passion, then take time out to contemplate what it is you would love to achieve, even if it feels a million miles away from where you’re at right now. The important thing is you need to discover what your vision is of what you would love your life to be like.
Follow this simple guidance to lead you nearer to who you really are and what you’re here to serve and start taking some action.
- Take time out. Have a pen and paper ready to record your thoughts and find somewhere to meditate or sit quietly. Close your eyes and when you are fully relaxed or in a meditative state, ask your heart what your purpose is, even if it’s just a feeling that you receive. Sometimes it may be something we loved to do as a child. Play with it and trust what you feel.
- Once you have that in your heart, see it as a vision in your mind as if you’re actually living your purpose right now. Heighten that vision by awakening all the senses such as seeing, hearing, tasting, smelling and touching until that vision becomes alive in you.
- When it feels right, ask yourself what will lead you closer to that goal. Open your eyes gently and let your thoughts come to you naturally and write those ideas down so as to action them later. Choose perhaps 10 i.e. to become a writer, your ideas could be to:
- create a weekly blog
- write articles for a specialist magazine
- create your own newsletter
- From that list of ideas, decide to take one at a time to work on and give yourself a timeline to work towards, depending on the time and level of commitment you can achieve. Plan it so that you hold yourself accountable. If you choose weekly or monthly stick to that, but choose what is achievable so as not to be disappointed. The aim is to work within the realms of possibility but pushing the parameters of who you are.
- Working on each individual idea, write another list of all the actions you can take that bring you closer to that idea and give yourself a timeline to work towards achieving your goal. So, if you chose writing for a specialist magazine as our example, you could write several ideas for that such as:
- research what magazines to approach
- create a media contacts list
- research what readers want from those magazines
- research writing pitches for magazines
- create the ideal pitch for each individual magazine
- offer to write a regular column for particular magazines
- create a generic article
- create a list of article ideas to write about etc.
- Continue to work through each idea but bear in mind that what you originally felt would take you nearer to your purpose can sometimes flag up underlying assumptions or negative programs about what you thought you wanted. Work through each idea, giving your best intention and efforts but make a note of what isn’t working.
- Let it resonate with your heart at all times and if something isn’t working out:
- ask yourself is there a way of doing it differently
- perhaps you can’t quite see how to resolve it, so look deeper
- perhaps that idea won’t help you to get closer to your goal after all
- maybe it’s blocking you as you have a fear or underlying assumption. You may recognise there’s a deeper negative program that’s perhaps blocking you. This is very normal and will give you an opportunity for growth which will help you to grow into your abundant, authentic and purposeful self.
Recommended reading
‘The Path of Least Resistance’ by Robert Fritz http://amzn.eu/d/bVSU8Wp
Drawing on his background as a composer, Fritz writes about how to make the right choices to improve your ability to create what you want, and the importance of having a firm grip on current reality and future vision in order to move from where you are to where you want to be. This is a great read to understand the power we have within us to create our purpose.
By working through your ideas and actions to take, you will find this naturally takes you towards that which is for your highest good. If it becomes apparent that you have a block, then this is the time to address it in order to see the lesson it’s teaching you to expand into your newly developing, authentic self.
“Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Willing is not enough; we must do.” – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Getting ‘out of yourself’ in order to grow
Sometimes that means getting outside help to see what you can’t, so as to grow.
This may well be the time to take the opportunity to work through the 5 stages to:
If you’d love to work with Amanda and find out how you can ‘Unlock Your Truth’ to start living your Authentic Life, get in touch at info@amanda-hart.co.uk or call 07854 392225 to arrange your free 20 minute consultation
What people say about Amanda:
“Amanda has an incredible gift, extremely perceptive and a finely honed sixth sense.” Katy Sunnassee, Editor of Top Sante Magazine, UK
“Amanda’s guidance created immediate changes in my life and a testament to her incredible work and her words continue to resonate with me today.” Samantha Martin, Client Partner at Two Mad Cowboys, Australia
“Amanda rescued me from a very dark place with PTSD. I owe Amanda so much and am eternally grateful to her.” Chrissy, Herts, UK
“Amanda helped me to step into a future I thought could never possibly exist.” J Valentine, UK
“Amanda helped me to find my power that transformed my life which continues today.” Fiona, Bucks, UK
“Amanda Hart is a genuine phenomenon.” Kizzi Nkwocha, Publicist, Presenter & Publisher, France
“Amanda leaves you feeling that you have met a truly extraordinary, insightful, highly attuned soul who is connected to a higher purpose.” Amanda Morley, Psychologist, UK
What people say about Amanda’s story in The Guys Upstairs:
“The Guys Upstairs is a brave and beautifully written book.” Jason Figgis, TV & Film Director/Producer at October Eleven Pictures, UK
“A page turner…truly inspirational and admirable.” Estella Arias, Literary Agent, New Chapter Editions, Miami, USA
“Un-put-downable…pacey and brilliantly written.” Adam Bishop, CEO Information TV, UK
“A work ahead of its time.” Dr Arthur Cassidy, Social Media & Celebrity Psychologist & Broadcaster, Ireland
“A power that shines through every page.” Evan Stark, PhD., MSW Professor Emeritus, Rutgers University, USA
“Amanda Hart shines a powerful spot light on a hidden epidemic.” DCI Steve Jackson, National Domestic Abuse Co-ordinator, College of Policing UK
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